I walked into the apartment after my consulation last night and nothing had changed. The million throw pillows were still perfectly placed on the couch. The pineapple I cut the night before was still being chilled in the refrigerator waiting to be eaten. The TV was still tuned to Bravo. Everything in its place, but I wanted it all to be different.
As some of you know, my boyfriend, Phil, has been in South East Asia since January. I last saw him 86 days ago when I left Thailand after a whirlwind of a trip visiting Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh, Hoi An, Nha Trang) and Cambodia. And while we have done the long distance thing more than once over the last 10 years together, this time feels the longest … the hardest …. and the strangest.
We are over 8,000 miles apart. Living in two different days (literally) in two different worlds. I am so blessed to be extremely busy in Chicago with work, dates with friends and dinners with family, but even with everything else in my life being so “full” it feels a little empty with Phil not here.
Our not so successful attempts at video chatting and phone calls seem to be more about “can you hear me” …or … “what, you are cutting out” than actual conversations. And while g chat and whatsapp have made me feel a little closer so I can tell him about my day or send a funny picture to him, we are still so far apart. Long distance sucks. Seriously. To all my couples out there who do this for months / years … you are SO strong. There are days when I wake up, and I miss him so much it hurts … that I think about jumping on a plane for a 17-hour flight just to see him for a few days in between my work schedule. The next 25 days seem as if they are forever away. :( I am ready to come home to the throw pillows on the floor, an empty bowl of pineapple and ESPN on the TV …. so that I can be right by his side again.